“I Don’t Hear the Canaries Anymore.”

Radical Hope in the Age of Propaganda.

Conspiracies always contain at least one grain of truth which eventually unleashes an avalanche. We have for years now watched how the internet and social media, once marketed to us an a utopia where free information and communication would flow across the world turn into a cesspool of bot activities, capitalistic driven trends and viral cycles usually pushed by fixed algorithms and paid engagement to get us to hate ourselves and each other more and in turn buy another product or idea.

I can’t imagine quitting the internet — The mass amount of information I have available to satiate my reasearch needs is the stuff that I imagine would make a medival peasant’s brain melt. It would certainly make my younger self lose her mind. Like most people my age in America, I fantasize about disappearing into a cottage in the woods.

I wish that leaving social media was simple but as an artist, I am tied to these platforms to communicate my message, market myself and work. On a personal level, I love to keep up with new baby and food pictures and firework videos from my friends. I dont say that sarcastically either, I truly, truly love that we are in the day and age where distance doesn’t necessarily keep you from being friends with the people you care about. I ascrible to the dead internet conspiracy tho. I see the decrease in authentic, organic engagement and the increase in shit content. The algorithm shows me trauma porn, other pornographic content and sales sprinkled with the content I actually engage with like gardening stuff, memes and friends. With that said, I feel very strongly against Conspiracies.

Even before COVID19 where every shit for brain in my life on and off the internet got the ban for spewing conspiracies, misinformation and downright eugenic rhetoric I had a short fuse. I still avoid anyone wild enough to deny COVID happened because to be fair, I almost died of it. Conspiracy theories are also triggering for me after literally being psychologically tortured by an ex, who would continually play Alex Jones videos the entire day while he was in manic episodes. Being subjected to the deeply damaging content and baited into arguments was truly de-regulating and had both of us almost falling into the pipeline that goes: Christianity to Evangelicalism, to Trad Life right down to the alt right. Thankfully, we were too non-white and realized the trap and moved on pretty quickly, but for about six months there, I did not realize that the libertarians aren’t actually anarchists (like in the rest of the world) but just republicans that smoke weed and that my ex had a mental health issue.

This morning I woke up glad to not live in Fredericksburg, Viriginia or anywhere near a small town after the Trump assasination attemp. I also woke up with dread, wondering how much violence has gone un reported last night? After all, the US is a continent sized country with systemic issues that create the conditions for un reported or under reported violence across the board. I assert there was many and we won’t know outside of oral history or come to light only with community pressure for reporting. I know that in small towns in the USA the paper media as most every other aspect of society is extremely insular and controlled by evangelical and conservative interests.

I worried about the violence yet to come. Not just the violence that will be unleashed if he is elected or not. Nor do I speak of the damage that Project 2025 is alredy inflicting in the most vulnerable communities across the country, most of whom have been suffering all along. We were the canaries in the mine all along, just like we said, just like history said:

First they came for the Communists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Communist

Then they came for the Socialists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Socialist

Then they came for the trade unionists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a trade unionist

Then they came for the Jews
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Jew

Then they came for me
And there was no one left
To speak out for me

-Martin Niemöller

I worry about the violence unfolding every day as they grow more radicalized, more resolute, more empowered and entitled to violence, “an eye for an eye.” They’ve got the perfect excuse, from a perfectly bad actor.

Going down the rabbit holes of social media, where different video points of view show us angles of the klans rally where the shooting took place. Some of them begging analysis as you watch the entire series of events with context. I just call bullshit and leave it at that, I do not want in any way to write my own deportation letter by asserting that this is fake news, paid actors, orchestrated events, a psyop. I am in no way suggesting that at all.

What I do suggest however is that the left and liberals are once again, laughing now and crying later their way through this election cycle too. Just like the smell of rain on hot asphalt I can smell and feel the storm coming. This is a darker storm than the cycle before this one. Christians and Republicans who previously hated him are flocking to his defense after this attack by a registered republican white kid with a gun, they are covering Trump in prayer, no doubt he has gained their sympathy votes. Even well intentioned liberal rhetoric of ‘wish death on no one’ falls short. Shitposter myself, I know the value of a good meme in trying times but for the love of fuck do not support the lionization and martyrdom of a lunatic with an agenda, he isn’t the matrix guy ducking bullets, he is not a hero. His camp want to humanize him to some, make him seem divinely protected by others and accepted at least in the context of popular cultures. To photoshop trump’s face onto fifty cent is damn near demonic. To see it behind Curtis himself at a concert truly a heart break.

Just in the past few weeks, all of the beautiful communities I am blessed to be in touch with, on and off line have collectivelly and individually wonder out loud “what will happen if he is elected again?” Worrying and preparing for the worse. I don’t want to give negative thoughts my energy and time and I don’t mean that in a spiritual bypassing sort of way — I mean that I understand myself enough to know I fall in despair, and rage. Still to this day, it happens so quickly sometimes that it burns the pit of my stomach and scratches my throat when I speak. I avoid reaching this point, I go to therapy, I pray, I heal. I react differently.

I spent the first six months of this year travelling across the USA again. Priviledged to participate both in trainings from World Leaders, Scientists, Artists and other experts in enviromental justice and social arts, as well as in panels, talks, facilitating workshops lending my own expertise in a wide array of subjects but always teaching how to ally yourself and support vulnerable communities, especially undocumented folks. All that I have learned through my life as my own experiences are information that community leaders, organizers, artivists and people at different spaces are taking with them onto whatever happens next. Maybe it is the incredible amount of information, conversation and dissection and furry hack of Project 2025, the constant and sustained movements, protests, occupation of University spaces and other places that belong to The People, or the increased access to quick communication and information through content creation using social media. As much as a its been a tool for chaos, social media also has allowd people to co-teach and learn as information is shared, it has built solidarity across continents and celebrate the wins of other countries with more progressive ideas and leaders and that truly represent them give me hope.